Some gay men swear I am bi-curious. This barback at a bar I frequent was quizzing me on it. He says that since I don't shy away from him or wince when he tells me stories of how he turned some cute white boy out, teaching him how to properly suck dick, and then after time went by the young man became a professional cum bubble blowing maniac, that I must be slightly interested. He was also shocked that I never had any homosexual experiences with my childhood homies, he just assumed that all boys experimented with each other as kids. Take pussy out of my life and I'd whither like a worm on a sun baked sidewalk. Just not threatened by anyone's sexual preference, even completely flamboyant types who are possibly hitting on me. Hell, if gay guys think I'm attractive, I take it as a compliment, they have good tastes.

Speaking of cum gargling. Extremely satisfying it is to gush all over the angelic face of some cutie. Facials are fun. I'm amazed by the amount of women I have come across who actually enjoy having their face coated. It is astoundingly gratifying to watch a chick relish in your spunk sprinkler. Sure there is an element of degredation involved in it. That's what makes it so pleasing. If she is down for it so am I. This is why I don't have to talk to a girl's tits, I have enough going on in the face to keep my deviant thoughts fed. Sorry ladies, even when talking about the most somber of subjects with you, men will always picture what you look like on all fours, with your ankles behind your head, with your lips wrapped around our shaft, and/or coated in our baby batter. Maybe not for the entire conversation, but there are definite advert breaks from the sponsor: "My Cock In You".

I wonder if there is a job called lube boy for porn starlets. Just want to provide the public service of keeping our precious resource, porn pussy, safe from damaging penetration of monster cock. I'm here for you America.