Now I have to ask chicks, who don't know me from Chester the molestor, if they can step closer so I can get a better view of their bod-day. I'll at least make sure to remember to wipe the drool from my goatee previously to flagging them over.

Disgustipated with myself. Fuzzy reflection in the bathroom mirror. Never realised how much less sexy the last pair of specs I have, compared to the one I just destroyed. Ultra space aged thin lenses. Silver rims. These old ones look like Mr. Magoo's in contrast.

All I was doing was wiping the smudge off for hamburger sake. Felt the frames give way under my fingers covered by the bottom of my tshirt. Hoping I was just having another halucination. Didn't want to look down at my palm and see that unset lens winking at me. No such luck, not having a brain spasm, actually broke spectacles. Damn reality.

Reacquired my squint master position. Captain Squint! The Duke of Squintington. Gladys Sight and the Squints. Straining the orbs to write this gem. Strangers probably assume I am trying out my Clint Eastwood impression.

Eye to Eye Vision Center has assured me that my replacement is already on the way. The flustered lady behind the counter didn't fill me with confidence. She was pleasant however. Super fortunate for everyone in the shop. Wind up on NY1, live coverage of me in a hostage situation after some snotty retail slime gave me a hard time. Then I'd have to demand a jar full of ears.

Decided to go see 28 Days Later afterwards. Giant screens with bright projections of moving pictures is about all that is comfortable for me to look at. The karmic imps dancing across my shoulders were also kind. First time in a while that an early morning viewing at a theater didn't have any jabbering melvins constantly buzzing my ear. One of these days I'm going to wind up fetching the hot butter flavored oil bucket and douse the aisle of idiots who don't know how to shut the fuck up.

28 Days Later was alright. Didn't scare me. Zombie movies are amongst my favorite horror. Danny Boyle obviously was trying to be innovative with it. Give us just one brief scene of flesh eating though. When I see undead zombies, I wanna see them chewing through some human flesh. He also beefed up the morality play a tad much. Yeah yeah, us normal living people are the same as the marauding violent maniac diseased zombies. They are we. I got it. Can I put ice on the spot on my head where you clubbed it now?

One tendency that really upsets me in horror movies is the character's stupidity. It comes down to simple instinct. If you've been running for miles, dodging murderous creatures, self preservation requires you don't voluntarily walk into the dark alley. I know we need to see the monsters jump out at us. Still, it's completely predictable as to what will happen after someone says "hey Billy, don't wander off." "leave me alone I know what I'm doing.", blood flings, guts rend.

Too many instances of that in 28 Days for my appetite. When I have to pause the suspension of disbelief with an exacerbated sigh, and think to myself, "why in the name of Sam Raimi did you write that into the script", the whole viewing experience loses pleasure points.

Lose enough pleasure points and you are in danger of having your armour class drop a level. Then you'll never find the treasure at the Ghost Tower of Inverness! Valkyrie is about to die.

Did I mention I broke my glasses. Grrrrrrrrr. Bunny fuck.