Once again my current chump designation has me scheduled to slave on my third favorite holiday. Verily, I type this as my ass dumps sweat into my office chair. I don't believe they know that they poke the bear. Keep chucking coals on the rage fire.

Fortunately, my slave space has a balcony on the top floor. A mostly unobstructed view of the skyline. Even all the way over here on the west side I should be able to soak up both pyrotechnic displays. They use to alternate the location from Hudson to East Rivers every year. I suppose they think it would be easier to launch a terrorist attack from Jersey. So the more deserving east side has had a run on the show last four years.

I'm sure terrorists are hatched in incubatory mud pits in Jersey. Can single out that particular waft from the massive stink that blows in from that parking lot. Macy's should just blow up a neighborhood of Jersey every year on the Fourth.

The taxi ride was more foul than usual. Going against the tide of eastward bound revelers. It is funny to see suburban families, all decked out in their summer pastels, tremble slightly as I pass by them and sneer. Father's calling on their gods that their sons won't grow up to walk around like the unshaven black clad heathen that just breezed by them.

Also, the cabbie had a deformity. Discovered by me since his meter was malfunctioning. Kept alerting that it's case was loose. He pulled over and banged on it with his hand. And there it was.

Out of his thumb was a secondary phalange sticking out the side. Complete with a nail and everything. This image was not helped by the fact that he obviously did not believe in hygiene much less cosmetic surgery. Dirty crusty finger nail right next to the additional dirty crusty fingernail. Double the stomach sour.

Some people find abnormalities fascinating or even exciting. Filling their libraries with books on freaks. I have never been of this ilk. Habibi's branching thumb has put me off food for the night.

My sis was born with twelve fingers. At birth they tied them off. Shriveled up into black baby finger raisins. Ma picked them out of the crib one morning. Sis was left with tiny bone nubs.

She had the nubs well into prepubescence. I always found the diminutive buttons kinda weird. Never exactly grossed me out. They did have a particular spring to them that I didn't like accidentally brushing against my skin. A plastic sawbones cut them out. Barely can see the marks showing evidence that they once existed.

Course I inherited the mental freakdom. She isn't exactly a typical chick my sis. She blends in well with the sheep though. Might be more insidious that. Being all counter wolf draped in pablum wool. People pretty much bank immediately that I swim in the fringe pool. This has served me well in that I never find myself trapped talking to strangers about stocks, lawn care, coupon specials, traffic woes, or whatever topic was on Good Morning America that day.

I do get trapped talking to maniacs. More likely to be good for a chuckle than golf scores.