Working insane amounts of overtime recently. Set my alarm for the exact time when I was suppose to be in work today. Boner move sets off a boner feeling day.

The toddler mourning doves took flight with their ma yesterday. Hopping around the fire escape railings. Mother would swoop in and regurgitate up some nummy treats. Finally, after stretching the wings, and making test flights around my window, they launched as a family.

YEAR THIRTEEN: First official teenage year. First official initiation into the pubescence disease. I heard a song floating around lately proclaiming the formation of the secondary sexual characteristics age span to be the best years of our lives. BULL - SHIT. Horse puckey. Cow patties. Elephant stink boulders. Bum biscuits. Liquified poo thunderstorm. Moose pellets. Freshly pinched loafs. Turdly turdington from turdsville.

Wispy diminutive curlies finally started sprouting out my balls late that year. My grandpa told me a story about some kids that told him if he shaved his jimmie and huevos area the pubes would grow back twice as thick. In his own words "I wanted a healthy crop". Said putting on his overalls hurt for weeks afterwards. I still gave it brief consideration.

First productive jerk off session. Remember this weird ticklish sick feeling hovering behind my belly button. My eyes felt like the sockets were squeezing them. Liquid handsoap looking goo dribbles out my dick. Hard to explain actually. Combination of fascination, guilt, ecstasy, fright and confusion.

The older half of the brother duo that lived three houses down from me was developing at the same pace as me, even though he was about a year younger. We discovered and hunted titty mag stashes all over the neighborhood. Pretending to clean someone's basement, sniffing out the Playboys. We both started drawing naked chick fantasies. Comparing each other's work. "Niiiiice nipple man".

Couple weeks after my first load, he calls me up. Strangest confession ever. Said he was on the floor looking at his mother's fashion mags when a few drops came out. He was all excited. I didn't know the etiquette protocols involved in someone's first spurt. Should I say "hey, cool dude" or "wow, are you alright?" or find a Hallmark card - Congratulations On Your First Ejaculation.

I was into comics anyway, but because of this burgeoning stiffy activity I started collecting Heavy Metal. Amassed the entire library from 77' to 84'. Fortunately my out of control skin flute led me towards great international artists. Richard Corben, Geraud Moebius, Vaughn Bode, Guido Crepax, Milo Manara, HR Giger, Frank Frazetta and on and on. Sparked an overall interest in art, thanks dirty picture pencillers of the world.

Ma threw away most of them because they were "old". We had an extremely nasty verbal battle over that incident. Normally, I'd just let her have the last word cause she can be a stubborn stern lady when she sets her mind to it. But her white tornado tactics had trashed many of my treasured possesions before, and I reached my breaking point. She never cleaned my room ever again after that fight. We also didn't speak to each other for about a week afterwards.

You'll recall the pussy blazing hottie Darlene from year twelve. She took a curious hankerin to my geeky little ass. Could not explain it for the life of me. She used to sneak up behind me and feel up my cheeks while breathing deep down the back of my neck. Occasionally she would "accidentally" goose me. She eventually coaxed me into the supply closet of the school. Place was cluttered with Elmer's glue, old textbooks, and school nick knacks. Still can smell the dusky dank odor of that room. Threw me up on the discarded principal's wood office desk, and forced her hand down my Levi's. I was saluting way before that. She barely got on top of me and was just sliding the head of my cock into her when I unleashed. Put yogurt stains all over her skirt.

Christ, when the tip of my dick felt that warm gooey moisture, I went into system overload. I think I might of even shouted from release, something along the lines of "Buwaugh!". Super sexy cool.

All an embryonic crackhead needs is that first hit. Detox shakes for the rest of your life till the next score. That's basically the way it was for me and pussy. One major problem with that though. You'll note that my cherry was popped at thirteen, didn't get my next taste of divinity until nineteen.

Six years of fingernail chewing, eye twitching, cum backing up into my brain insanity. Sexual frustration could drive a man to invade Poland. Just wait till you here what it did to me. Fucking high school, bleh.