Sitting here, figuring out a synopsis of the dream is making me shake some. Loathe to retell it as the mere typing out is a goblin orgy mating call, destination my cerebral cortex.

Back in my old childhood crib on a St. Louis street. Streetlamp illumination cutting through the curtained windows like spectres. I am struggling to toss out an indiscriminate jackaline jarhead through the front door. I succeed and barely get the screen door shut, which has in the storm pane glass, instead of the air permeable wire mesh. This angers the man greatly, with a hungry face he tosses a rolled up weekend edition newspaper at the glass, shattering it. Tornado of sharp splinters whisk through my hair. I slam the main wood door. Locks taunting me, spinning on their threads, as the madman's teeth are bared inches away through the looking glass.

I back away into the livingroom. Electricity sliced. Phones dead. Flashlight beam invaders erratically coming in from all angles. Pool of light through the front door from the porch bulb, shows a fox dutifully sitting guard, ears perked, staring down the dark back hallway.

I tell my sis to give me her cell phone. She's mute. Desperate for her to acknowledge me I scream in her face to get her fucking cell phone. She refuses, saying she doesn't have to do what I say. I turn and realise the fox is not standing guard, but petrified rigid in his spot.

Front door splinters open. Unexplained baseball bat in my hands, I raise it over my torso like a two handed scabbard. I shatter the entire contents of the first intruder's mouth. He stumbles outside into the night. See a fevered mob of murderous zealots climbing over each other, actually partially blocking their own progress, to be the first to get a taste of my family.

Wake up. Heart held back by my ribcage. Head rebooting, can see bits of information piecing together in the air, diagnostics on reality. Sweat beads jiggle with each forced breath. Spend the rest of the wee hours staring at my apartment door, failing to convince myself that it's alright to go back to sleep.

It's affected my walk.

So yeah, been watching my life as if I am just to the side, shoulder to shoulder, with the real spanky. Had to squeegee as much thick muddy silt off my subconcious as possible before being able to think clearly enough to write.

From the Supreme Court of Spanky, a one entry moratorium has been placed on Ages Of Spanky regression tales. Avoiding nightmares inspired from my own history.

Luckily the homies were on point with a valiant spliff cannon. Sweating in the damp city stew, was coping easily with a chronic smoke hammock. Chilled in Brooklyn watching The Animatrix. Admittedly some head screw moments in those animated shorts that probably didn't need to be apocalyptically enhanced with outside herbal influences. I don't mind riding rollercoasters freestyle without safety harness, and hanging from outside the car. So I enjoyed muchly.

Sully came up with a great comedic idea. Depends Thongs. The adult undergarment for the pensioner with style as well as incontinence. Can see the commerical now. Tight curled white haired perm, pastel blue golfing outfit, teeing off on the first hole. Bunched up furrow under her pant's backside, landing strip of absorbant material running down her buttcrack clearly visable through polyester cloth. Grannie going to the retirement home polka, styling the newest latest jean hip huggers, top of the skinny diapers poking out the top. Show your grand daughters that you can be hip too, buy Depends Thongs. The possibilites are extensive.

Also, since I was crazy stupid high, moments after peeling off the clothes and sliding into bed, I was furiously punching the clown. Took an exquisitely pain tickling long time to nut. Wall of cream running down the back of my hand like molten ivory. Willingly cleaned myself off like a lazy lion preening himself in the shade after boning the tribe. Realised I am a deviant cannibal.

It's my product anyway, might as well recycle the primordial nutrients. Slight gorgonzola sting, but fairly neutral overall. Make sure to eat plenty of fruits and veggies, as well as draining gallons of water daily. Gotta keep the spunk as sweet as possible. Besides, any man who's afraid of his own liquid can't be too secure with much of anything in his world.

Spank Ejaculate: Builds strong bones and teeth. An essential part of a healthy breakfast.