A Carvel ice cream cake divvied up, people pretending they actually care about the recently pink slipped, and a signed farewell card. I wrote "get some catfish! Spankie." seeing as whenever I tried to have a conversation with el crapitain he always would ramble onto tangents of Mississippi catfish and sandwiches. Its not my fondest desire to see him and his family hunting rats on the street, but I don't wish him all the luck in the world either. Couldn't give a shit what happens to him. How can you be so heartless? Fuck you, like you knew the fucking guy and are honestly consumed with empathy over his situation. Bleed your own heart out in your little sensitivity gush corner. I'm sure someone needs a corpulent, thicker than a walrus souffle, cum drenched fuckhole, rambling toffee head. Every morsel of garbage finds it's place on the universal landfill.

Thinking maybe I should start wearing offensively worded t-shirts to work in aid of me losing this job. Like the ever popular Negativland "Christianity is Stupid" or something along the biker lines like "Gas, Grass or Ass....Nobody Rides for Free". Just design one of my own that says "My boss juggled my balls in his mouth and all I got was this lousy t-shirt".