Why the joy? It's my little boy coming out. I just bought the next series of Simpsons action figures. Right now Homer in his bowling shirt, Barney with his mug of beer, Chief Wiggum and his donut, Smithers with his photo of Mr. Burns, Ned Flanders and Bart in his Sunday's best are all staring at me. Yay. I have everything that has come out. Already got the whole family and their living room complete with Santa's Little Helper and the cat, Snowball? (I am ashamed that I don't know her name right now, and I will immolate myself for it). I have the nuclear power plant, which came with Homer in his hazmat suit, complete with a scene of the worst meltdown in Springfield history. Also I have Mr. Burns, Grampa, and Krusty. The next two things to come out will be the Kwicky Mart with Apu and a Squishy machine, and Springfield Elementary with Pricipal Skinner. The coolest thing about them is that they talk. They all have ports on the bottoms of their feet which attach to one of three jacks in the floors of the different rooms, and they say different things when their in different rooms. Except for Maggie who just sucks her pacifier. I know I'm a big geek. And if you thought that already its either cause your a closet geek, or your not a geek and then who cares about you.

Why the depression? My good friend Thomas, just lost his best friend to some stupid biker bullshit. And I've been comforting him the past two weeks, but last night it was too much and old wounds opened up. I lost four good buddies before I was twenty two. I have many friendships but only a couple real ones, and you know what I mean. Rachel is one, and she just had that scary bike accident, and she's had other brushes with near horror. Damian is the other, and he just got out of a really dangerous and damaging relationship. I'm not too worried about him now, but he's still a little gun shy. I manage to have a good time with the ladies but its fairly empty. The couple of women I thought I could have a lasting and meaningful relationship turned to shit for various reasons. Actually I always pick the wrong people, nice flaw huh. My mom and dad are going to lose their parents soon, they're all too sick. Dominoes. The only people I care about Rachel, Damian, Cassandra, my parents and my sister, and they could go in a heartbeat. Just feeling a little alone. Ok, gotta stop cause I'm feeling crummy and this isn't being particularily cathartic right now.