I'm allergic to caffeine. As a double stuff fuck, I'm also allergic to chocolate and most nuts. Why have I not slit my wrists? You know how when someone loses their sight or hearing and the other senses become enhanced to compensate. Well my other vices just stepped up and started working overtime. I have to tell ya, when the doc told me I had to give up coffee, cola, chocky treats and the like I just stared at him for ten minutes, hoping that my intense gaze would force him to stop the video and reveal that I was truly on Candid Camera. We'd all chuckle and then I would start bitch slapping people. I pity the fool that takes my coffee. Alas, twas not to be. A month after I gave up caffeine I felt better than ever. However I still drool when a waft of fresh brewed java crosses my proboscis.

I would also like to bid adieu to the naked action across the way from me at my office. There is a photography studio over there. I have landscaping windows, they have landscaping windows and the occasional titty and booty show. It was a lovely relationship. I would fondly glance over, and they would honor me with some skin. Farewell perky nipples and roundy asses, I must depart for a new department. We do have access to all the security cameras though. Hopefully I'll catch some secretary employing her dictation skills. Having hackers as homies has its benefits.