When I'm depressed nothing brings me down more than someone else trying to get me to talk about it. When I'm angry nothing gets me more pissed than someone else trying to get me to talk about it. Discussing and sharing whats beating my brain up never helps me. To hell with all that pyschobabble. I'm not bottling it up, I'm trying to figure it out. And if I need help trying to figure it out, which is rare, I'll ask. Every single time I have realised the solution to an issue I'm having it's cause I was meditating upon it by myself.

I loathe "What's the matter" and "Can we talk". Instantly signals my shedding response. Shoo it away like a pesky gnat.

In art and design there is a term called horror vacue, which translates to a fear of empty space. Like a hardware store ad in the newspaper where every millimeter is covered with information. Its the empty spaces that create interest and value in a piece. I'm paraphrasing here, but its the absensce of matter that gives windows their worth. Aural imput is no different than visual. The absence makes the present better.

Admit it. If you constantly feel the urge to fill the air with your voice its because of the self doubts you have. What's he thinking? Maybe its about you, maybe he's thinking - why won't she shut the fuck up. Why are you so scared to let a brain breath? What is it that makes you have to constantly have your noise enter a person's head? I'm looking for the person who can savor the calm periods of life. And when hectic moments arrive they don't feel the urge to swim with the tide and intensify the drama. My silence bothers you not cause you see it as an emotional weakness in me but because you don't have the confidence in yourself to not care what I'm thinking.

The emptiest pail makes the loudest noise.

I enjoy conversation and discovering what makes a person tick. My need to figure shit out on my own is not a rejection of you or your trust, its embracing the faith I have within myself for myself. Don't use me as a vehicle for your cravings of drama and emotional voyuerism. Buy a movie ticket.