Get that white boy a man of the cloth, he's possessed!

Gravel flying from the tread of my shoes. Rubber band facial expressions while fighting my mayonnaise heritage to make my body loosen up. Crazy spank original spastic innovations on the square of linoleum. I'd fear for my safety as well as an onlooker.

To all those white boys trying to implement any tactic of the hip hop nation, be careful. Tactics including breakin, rappin, cutting the vinyl, speaking the lingo, walking the walk, and wearing the ghetto fabulous gear. You are toying with forces that you may not be able to control, and probably don't understand. Could rend a rift in the street time continuum.

Tread easy grasshopper, saying "for shizzle my nizzle" through thin euro lips could cause irreparable damage to innocent bystanders.

Worst of all you're probably just offending my sense of taste and my old school skin. That alone is heavy enough. Stick to your mullets and NASCAR dammit.